Unconditional Love

This sunday, 18 children from all of the provinces in Cambodia performed at our church (Fairview at River Club).  Andy, Jennifer, Rachael and I were asked to speak in each service and I created a 4 minute video for the service as well.  Our church centered the day around the mission trip and the children.

I arrived at the church a few minutes early and thought to myself, hold it together!  It was so emotional, the idea of talking to all the congregation about the trip had so many emotions it was hard to think I would be able to hold back the tears.  I was doing pretty well and I had gotten all of my defenses up in order to make it through.  then about 2 minutes before we started, I saw the children.  Four of the boys saw me from the edge of the stage where they hid behind the curtain.  Our eyes met and they waved and smiled.  Such an honest loving hello!  I couldn't help it, I jumped up and ran over to them hugging and kissing them and saying hello.  They had been asking the adults for days when they would see me.  The young man Vireak that I gave an eagle to was wearing it and they told me he wore it every day and everywhere he went.  I was so touched.  Of course this all took down all my emotional barriers and it was exactly the right thing. 

The children did a wonderful performance.  Pastor Sinai the founder of New Hope for Orphans did a presentation on NHO and then we watched the video I had made.  It brought a lot of emotions up and I saw many folks with tears in their eyes.  It was a montage of pictures from the trip that I dubbed with the song "Our God is an awesome God".   Then it was time for us to speak and Dee (our pastor) gave us each 2 minutes.  Wow that was tough, I could talk for an hour.  So I chose to speak about the Unconditional Love of Christ.  How the children taught me that once I discarded my own pre-conceptions, predjudices, hang ups, worries, etc and opened my heart, the children's love just overwhelmed me.  It was such a lesson on how God loves us and for me, I was so blessed by these children and their gift to me.  I talked about how we pooled resources to buy rice for the Vietnamese children on the river. I talked about our experience with those children and how we jumped in and interacted with them strictly out of love and how they responded in kind.  In between services we had a table set up and we talked with folks about sponsorships.  We were lucky enough to get 5 more children sponsored!!!

After the service, we ate lunch in the church with the children.  It was so nice for Wendy to be with me.  I so badly wanted to share with her the bond that I had built with the children.  Vireak was a bit cold so he asked for us to go out in the sunshine in the back of the church.  When we did, another amazing thing occurred.  Recall that he is one of the boys I gave one of my Colonel eagles to.  So we step outside.... Wendy points to the sky and there right over our heads flew a bald eagle!  Amazing!  I could show him the real thing, right there in Fredericksburg.  Shortly thereafter all the children joined us to play out back.

After the service, we all met again at the George's house.  They had the whole group there for dinner.  It was great.  I got to talk with all the children and spend a lot of time with them.  I got soooo many hugs and kisses it was just wonderful.  While we were there, the ice cream man came and Andy grabbed him and held him there.  We all came running and with everyone grabbing whatever cash we had we bought ice creams for all the kids.  It was very very cool! 

After dinner it was time for me to leave.  Wow now this was so hard.  At least last time I knew I would see them today.  I talked to each child and told them I had to go.  I hugged them and we talked about how we would miss each other so much.  I held it together until the last girl.  She looked at me and her tears welled up.  I hugged her and kissed her on the head.  I told her I loved her and I meant it.  There is a place in my heart now for all the orphans.  I know I will never forget what they taught me and I so look forward to seeing them again.  They have my unconditional love.

Our last Orphanage visit - Phenom Penh

Today we visited the other orphanage in Phenom Penh, They call it PP1 and yesterdays was PP2.  It is a much larger orphanage and is 5 stories high.

When we first arrived the children's Choir which is coming to the USA later this week was practicing.  They are very very good.  I cannot wait to see them at the Church on Sunday the 4th of August.  A young boy of 15 came and sat next to me and instantly we made a connection.  It was wonderful.  His name is Moun Sauda.  And we got along great.  Of course then other boys and girls came over to see and they love the tablet so I got some nice pictures to send you. 

Also you can see the city from the top floor of the orphanage in two pictures below.

I took the older children 14+ aside and we talked about my story.  I talked to them about the choices they will need to make.  It is a rough city and the bad choices are everywhere.  We talked about God and about how they need to keep him as the center of their life.  We talked about how they need to look out for each other and nobody is perfect.  I gave the eldest one of my eagles and you can see a picture of him below.  The children really respond to my talk.  I think it is encouraging to them and they so rarely have an older male visit who focuses on them to try to connect.  I know now this is what God had in mind for me.  To focus on this specific group of children.

We sang songs and did Tie dye T-shirts.  The children were wonderful.  Many of them are in the choir and Kept asking if they would see me and Wendy, Rachael and Matthew next week as I told them all about them. 

Of course when time came to go, A boy and girl around 10 years old came to me and were stuck to me.  We hugged and many kisses on the head an more hugs.  They just don't let go and I don't want them to.  As you can see by the picture of Oudom (one of our translators) sleeping, this trip has been exhausting.  Non-stop and many many long days.

I have come to love these children.  They are a completely open book.  An open heart and so giving.  Its very hard to explain the emotional bond.  I have always been fond of children, but these precious boys and girls are so very special.

As I sit here at the airport preparing to come home, I reflect upon the week.  I reflect upon all these precious boys and girls and all I have seen.  My heart is full but I am sad.  At the same time I look forward to going home to my family and home.  It is a strange combination.

I will likely post on the blog when the Choir performs and then a final wrap up.  I have more than 500 photos so may post some miscellaneous information along the way.

Pol Pot and the Cambodian Genocide (graphic descriptions and photos)

Today we went to two memorials and museums that illustrate the terrible genocide that Cambodia suffered during the reign of Pol Pot.  During this period (1975 - 1979) over 3 million Cambodians were murdered by the ruthless Pol Pot regime.  This accounted for 1 in 4 people in the country.  One of my new friends from Cambodia, Piseth lost his mother and sister, Aunt and uncle.  When Pol Pot came to power, the country originally embraced him as he represented change.  Immediately upon assuming power they began emptying the cities and killing all of the educated people.  Anyone who was learned or a tradesman was killed.  Families were turned against each other and the children were drafted as ruthless soldiers to kill and torture their fellow Cambodians.

We began the tours at the Tuol Sleng Genocide Museum which is in Phenom Penh and was once a school.  Pol Pot turned this school into the infamous Office 21 or S-21.  It was used to imprison thousands of men women and children.  They were tortured until they confessed to plotting against Pol Pot and then murdered.  I viewed the horrible cells, torture devices, and pictures of all the prisoners that the torturers took when they entered the prison.  In the center are 14 graves of the 14 bodies that were found when the camp was liberated.  They were murdered at the last moment as the regime tried to escape.  Inside the former classrooms, they used bricks to create tiny prison cells.  they would chain up hundreds of people in stock like chains one right next to the other and take them for torture.  It was a very very sad and frightening place.

The second place we went, which is in the pictures attached is The Choeung Ek Genocidal center.   This is a place on the outskirts of the city which was a killing field along the river.  The regime would take blindfolded people there on trucks and murder up to 300 a day.  They would not use bullets as they were too expensive.  they used shovels and other tools to murder them.  This place was only to kill.  They poured DDT and other chemicals on the bodies to try to keep the terrible smells hidden from the city.  As you look through the pictures below (graphic) you will see a building in the center of the museum that houses over 800 human skulls that were recovered when they dug the area up after the war ended in order to document the murders and inter the people properly.  It is called the Memorial Stupa.  Also you can see the graves that are protected by roofs and dug up mass graves that are covered by grass.  You will see a glass box full of clothing recovered as a way to remember the dead.  You will see on top of the box bones, a jaw and other things.  You see there were so many murdered that as it rains here, those bones continue to surface even though they were dug up.  One picture shows clothing surfacing along with a leg bone and that is in the path that you walk!  You will see the killing tree.  The soldiers would seize babies from the mothers and holding them by the feet smash them against the tree until dead.

Lastly two pictures of the skulls.  A horrible sight.  I couldn't help but wonder who these people were.  It was all so terribly sad.

As we all gathered together after the viewing under a beautiful tree along the side of the museum, Jennifer George talked to us about what we all need to do to avoid such a thing. We know we cannot trust everything governments and the press say, we need to be curious and ask questions, we need to ensure that when we see wrongs we speak up and fight them, we need to love one another and we need to heed the messages of the Bible and what God tells us to do in treatment of one another. 

This was such an emotional visit.  There were very few if any dry eyes.

Phenom Penh

The city is very tense here in Phenom Penh.  The elections are in two days and the two major parties have people by the thousands streaming into the city.  They come on scooters and cars and trucks full.  adorned with flags and the colors of the party they are in the streets thick as ants.  I am looking outside the hotel and the streets are full of people chanting the party slogans and the rivals honk at each other and wave their flags.  The citizens here are very concerned for the country.  They desperately desire a better life and wish for democracy but are worried that the losing party may start a civil war.

Today we went to Phenom Penh 2 a brand new orphanage for New Hope for Orphans.  The previous group deserted the building and the orphans and was to set them out into the street.  NHO took over the orphanage and saved the children from that fate.   They are mostly older children.  Between the ages of 14 and 20.  These young folks were very receptive to the group.  As they were older, Julius had an awesome talk with them about decisions and choices and I talked about my story.  They were very receptive and i think encouraged.  We did tie dye t shirts with them and I used the t shirt I had here for when I sleep and did one with them too!  Dee had brought some bibles from Fairview at River Club and the young adults were very interested to have them.  They study English at school and as Christians it gives them more practice in their faith and studies.  Once again I felt so inspired by the team.  Each of these people brings a unique dynamic to Cambodia to help these children.

At lunch time (don't confuse it with lunch) we went to the Russian Market.  It is a set of stalls with crafts, clothes, silks watches etc.  I was able to barter for some nice gifts for my family.   Hope they like them!  I say don't confuse it with lunch cause we didn't get any.  It has been this way the whole trip.  Our priority has been the children.  To meet as man as possible and meals have been second.  We have gone long hours without but the wonderful thing is we have never ever complained.  The whole crew has been so wonderful and caring and none of this has been a problem.

After that we went to the Slums.  This is the very poorest part of the city.  The shantys are built on posts that are set over a canal full of human waste, chemicals, trash etc.  The narrow dirt streets are trash filled, have a coating of snail shells from the fresh water that they eat, Rats, and animals.  The people have to survive by renting a cart (you can see one in the pictures below), then they go around the city and collect trash that has some worth and bring it back to the rental spot.  They subtract the rental and whatever pennies are left, the people get.  Most of the children that were small were naked as they have nothing.  We walked into the area and almost every face I saw was either happy to see us or just curious.  It was not the reaction I expected.  I was a bit concerned about it as in a USA slum, you would be concerned about mugging or something worse.   But here we walked among  the shantys and gave the children candy.  They came running from all directions and it was wonderful.  Big children, tiny children, naked children and everything in between.  When we got deep into the slums, Dee gathered about a half dozen women and their children around him.  Some of the girls I think were forced to prostitute for money to survive.  He gave tehm a wonderful message from the bible and one of the women saw me coming and ran and got me a plastic chair to sit in.  I was so very humbled that this woman who lived in such poverty would get me a chair.  I felt I should get here one.. but no.. with a smile she gave it to me and then with her two children sat in the dirt to listen to Dee.

On the way back to the edge of the slums, all the children followed us.  we had a trail of them and Andy got an inspiration.  He went back to the van and grabbed a large duffle of new flip flops he had bought.  There in the dirt, amongst all that trash and very bad smells from the canal, he actually had the right number and sizes of flip flops to give every child a pair.  One child, completely naked except for his new shoes!  It was beautiful.

We then went to a church that one of the translators that travels with us and is an orphan ministers at in the slum.  We met some people from the phillipines who where there and the people streamed in for a service.  Their pastor spoke, we all sang in multiple languages, and then Julius spoke on how we are all one family in God.  It was a a wonderful message.  Dee provided a short service and then we went out of the church.  Outside the children from the slums awaited us.  I gave some of them yoyos, the Andy and Jennifer did a David and Goliath skit, Rachael and Julius did some magic tricks focused around a relationship with Christ and Dee gave them a very short but wonderful message.  The time had come to go.  The last picture below is Dee ministering to those children in the streets of the slum.  (this is on the outside edge and a nice part of it, inside the conditions were much much worse.

We wrapped up our day with a meal and I actually got a hamburger. Oh MY!  It was amazing.  No rice or noodles.  YUMMMM!!!

Road Trip!

I am now in Phnom Phen at the green house.  A guest house very near the slum districts of the city.  Yesterday we let the orphanage at Bonteay Meanchey and headed south to the city stopping at two orphanages along the way.

The first orphanage is at Pursat and we spent about 3 hours with the children.  I have put some photos of them and the orphanage below.  The children as at every orphanage were simply wonderful.  The programs ran from story of how God has the whole world in his hands and David an Goliath, to the story of the Bible and Christ related through colored bracelets that the team gave away.  We had a volleyball game and the Georges brought synthetic snow.. so we had a snowball fight! 

During our visit, I really felt connected to the older boys at the orphanage.  A girl of about ten to twelve with a speech impediment just attached herself to me and followed me everywhere.  She was at my side and wanted hugs and kisses on the cheek and stayed with me for an hour to include walking with me to the vans to leave. 

The reaction of the children when you leave is so very very sad.  Even though you are only with them for a short time, when you leave a few of them are so terribly sad they start crying.  At Bonteay Meanchey a small boy of ten was off to the side while we got ready to leave and I watched his eyes pool up and the tears start to fall.  He stood there alone, you could feel how very sad he was.  I of course joined him in crying and walked over to hug him for a while.  A very small consolation for a child who must at times feel so terribly lonely.

One thing that I felt called to do while I was here was to focus on the eldest children.  When they reach the age of 15-18 depending on circumstance they will leave the orphanage and have very difficult  choices to make.  The country is mostly Buddhist and the poverty is very extreme.  Society here pressures them towards drugs, alcohol, crime, prostitution etc and away from God and away from school and the education that the Orphanages ensure they receive.  It is fairly rare for someone my age and male to visit the older children.  they really have no older role models for encouragement.  So what I had decided to do is to sit with the oldest ones (14 and up) and tell them about me and my life.  I brought some pictures of Wendy and Rachael and Matthew and one of me walking Rachael down the aisle at her wedding.  To tell them a story that they could relate to about how if you choose to chase only the physical things in life and leave God aside, you will have nothing when those "things" go away.  Whether its a job or money or cars or whatever.  In the end I would challenge the eldest to look out for the other orphans and in that challenge I would give the eldest boy and girl a Colonel's eagle that I brought to always remind them to take the good path.  When they leave the orphanage they are to pass it to the next eldest.  After the first night when our hosts listened in, this became very important and they wanted me to speak to as many of the orphanages as we could reach.

After Pursat we stopped briefly (about 30 minutes) at Kompong Chnung to visit an orphanage.  Julius as always talked to the children in a masterful way.  He is such a loving person with these kids and you can tell they love him so.  We talked about how much Christ cared for them and that truthfully though they had no father here on earth they have the best father in heaven.  The Leader of the New Hope for Orphans group asked me to speak and I was so honored as it is about a 10 minute presentation.  Then Dee led us in a prayer for the group and we were gone.  A very brief visit, but impactfull for certain.

Some lighter moments today.  Those of you who know me may not be surprised... The ride was very very long (all day - about 12 hours) and after laying on the matts from the night before we were all very very sore.  At about noon time we went through Battam Bang on our way.  The elections are saturday and there were trucks of political supporters by the thousand all over the road.  I put a picture of one below.  Well in the city we were stuck in terrible traffic with scooters going every direction, to include across your path, next to you on both sides and in between cars, those huge trucks of people with loudspeakers and flags and uniforms.   Jennifer and Rachael decided they wanted a flag so Oudom our translator and who has become a friend, was yelling out the windows for flags to see if they would pass one to us.  I decided to help and started shouting in Cambodian what I thought Oudom was saying... well the four locals with us just started dying laughing and I was getting some weird looks.  Apparently my mimic was not so good and I was asking the Cambodian Peoples Party to send give me a prostitute.  "sigh".

I also attached a picture of a gas station you see on the side of the road.  They sell gas by the liter in glass jars.  Crazy!

Last story for today.  When we finally got here, my back was very very sore.  So for the first time ever I decided to get a massage.  They are 7$ for a 1 hour massage.  Well I was concerned due to the very high rate of prostitution here so I asked Oudom to come with me to ensure I ended up in a reputable place.  It was late at night (like 1130PM) so there were no Took Tooks nearby.  These are 4 passenger wagons mounted to a motorcycle.  So Oudom asked if a motor taxi was ok.  I thought ok, a car is fine.  Nope I was wrong, before I know it me, Oudom and the driver are on a scooter (yes all three - I have seen up to 6 people on one) blasting through the streets of Phnom Phen.  I have to say it was nice to have the breeze, but I am just glad we ended the ride safely!

Banteay Meanchey

We made it!   It was about a 2.5 hour drive out of the city of Siem Reap.  Along the way we passed many small villages and miles and miles of rice paddies.  Along the way we were passed by lots of trucks full of people, flags and loudspeakers talking about the upcoming election.  The person running in the opposition to the communist party was allowed to come back from Exile and today he and his political supporters.  We saw lots of water buffalos in the paddies, and lots of bulls, chickens and other crazy things.  The roads are narrow and many times I thought the van would not make a squeeze but our drier Hong is a pro and knows his van.  We made it through every time.

We stopped at a larger village along the way for some fruit.  The open market was really something to see.  hundreds of people selling everything from veggies, to rice, to dead chickens, live ones they would dispatch at the time you bought it.  There were lots of live eels and snakes and fish that people would home live.  It was very very hot humid and the crowd was thick. 

Finally after 2 hours, we turned into the jungle on a narrow dirt road which you can see below.  We traveled into the jungle for at least 30 minutes until we reached the orphanage.

The children were so happy to see us, we had an amazing greeting just as in Siem Reap.  After about 30 minutes of playing with the children, we started the beds which went upstairs.  You can see the materials and All of us carrying up the wood.  All the children pitched in and it formed a chain passing things up and carrying all the materials.  You could tell that we figured it out from the last orphanage.  We got all 20 beds made her in about 5 hours.  

The Orphanage made us lunch and now dinner.  For dinner we had rice, chicken soup with cabbage and onions, some salty grilled fish (head on) and some grilled eel which was surprisingly tasty.

We have no real internet connection here, but we are trying to upload it.  Might not be able to.

The kitchen is a fire pit outside the building over wood from the jungle.  There are chickens running about, a couple pigs nearby and a river across the street.

During dinner there was a huge rain storm which actually was nice.  It is so hot that I actually took a rain shower from the water off of the roof.  it was very nice and refreshing.

After dinner we watched a movie with the children.  Veggietales - Jonah and the whale.  Then we gave them new flip flops and shirts.  While watching I had a sweet little girl snuggle up with me in my lap and fall asleep.  What a precious angel.  I must admit< like with my children I was sleeping too!

I am now sitting inside my mosquito net on the mission house on the porch.  We are laying on a straw mat on the floor. There is rain dropping on the tin roof, geckos and frogs croaking and some animal howling in the jungle.  I can hear the children giggling on their new bunk beds.  It is unbelievably hot.  The sweat is rolling off of me as I type and contemplate sleep.   Being here with these people and these children, sharing God's love and my own... I feel like the luckiest guy in the world.